Restuarant Etiquette: Lead By Example
Submitted by Dr. Gwenn Is In
I was at a restaurant recently with my kids when a family of 4 was seated at a table near us, mom, dad and two kids that looked to be older elementary school age. Mom was apparently helping guide the kids to what to eat and we could over hear phrases now and again such as “healthy”, and “not so good for you”. “Why don’t you order this instead of that”, as she pointed. When their orders arrived, I noticed basic food with sandwiches and the like. Mom had a big fruit salad in front of her but then a few minutes later a huge plate of french fries arrived. Then, she took off her shoes and sat with her legs crissed-crossed on the chair. I should have mentioned we were in a restaurant in a fairly nice hotel. Dad was relatively quiet during this episode, by the way, and I believe he had a burger.
This image has stuck with me for a few weeks now. We all splurge from time to time, especially while eating out. And, eating “healthy” on vacation is a challenge. What stuck with me since this scene played out was not only the mixed messages this mom was giving these kids but about the lessons they were learning from her about how to act in public.
First, the lessons. Kids should learn to eat guilt free. It is perfectly fine to have a few chips and fries with a meal if kids understand portions and exercise and that they can’t eat fries and chips all the time. That takes time to learn and embody. It confusing for kids for parents to seemingly have a rule but not follow it them selves.
Second, the shoes. This is a pet peeve of mine. Shoes should be worn in public and for our kids to understand that, we have to wear them. They were not eating at pool side - this was a nice place. Perhaps they don’t “get out much”, as my kids like to say, but there is some decorum we all have to pass on to our kids for how to act in certain settings.
So, let’s try and lead by example. Our world these days is stressful enough. If we undo the expectations of how to act in public, our kids won’t know how to act when they are all grown up - and won’t know how to make healthy choices when faced with a menu without us around.
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