Sleep, Baby, Sleep…Just Watch Where!
Submitted by Dr. Gwenn Is In
This is very alarming! There’s been an increase in nursery-related injuries since 2005 that doesn’t seem to be related to product safety. As reported by the Wall Street Journal today,
“(n)ursery products were involved in 66,400 injuries that sent children to emergency rooms in 2006, an 11% increase from the year earlier, according to the Consumer Product Safety Commission.
The agency said in a report yesterday that the number of injuries to infants and children under age five involving cribs, high chairs, walkers and other items rose by 6,600 from 59,800 in 2005.
CPSC spokeswoman Julie Vallese said safety officials don’t know why the number of nursery-product injuries increased after declining in 2005. “We cannot identify the reason for the increase but it is a concern for the agency,” Ms. Vallese said.
The report said the incidents weren’t necessarily caused by product failures. Falls were the leading cause of injuries related to nursery products, with head injuries accounting for 42% of all injuries.”
In the same report, the CPSC reported that 241 children died between 2002 and 2004 from other nursery items such as strollers, baths, and play yards.
And, yesterday, the CPSC recalled 24,000 cribs manufactured by Munire Furniture for safety concerns.
This list of warnings and recalled items is frightening and should make us all pause for a moment. If the products are “safe”, why are these babies getting injured? I can thing of a number of issues.
First, as experts have suggested already, the current safety guidelines and screening protocols should be reviewed and revised. Perhaps we need better standards? Perhaps we need clearer definitions of current standards? Perhaps we need a better or different monitoring system?
Second, I’m concerned that parents do not understand how to properly use and monitor babies and toddlers who are placed in these items. As reported by USA Today, the CPSC noted this week that 36 babies died between 2002 and 2004 from parents not watching their children while in baby baths and bath seats.
So, something is not going right with parent education around safety issues for infants with regards to use of infant nursery products.
I’m not alone in my view. The Wall Street Journal report of this story quoted the Juvenile Products Manufacturers Association as noting that they were “concerned about any reports regarding the injury or death of our nation’s children,”….Then they added: “but that caregivers were often at fault.”
The Wall Street Journal opted for an interesting headline for this story: “Rise in Nursery-Product Injuries Baffles U.S. Safety Watchdog”. But, as you can see, this situation is far from baffling. Other than the recalled products, if we assume that most of these nursery products are safe, than user error is to blame for this scary rise in infant injuries. So, we need better user’s manuals and user training. And, better education for the importance of user monitoring of their own infants. The latter, I have a feeling, is the single most important variable in this entire equation.
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Commercials Are My Anti-Drug. Also Parents.
Submitted by Boys and Schools Blog
If, like me, you watch far too much TV and an embarrassing amount of it is of the cable reality show type (that is, if you have an informed opinion on the future of Flavor Flav’s and Brett Michael’s love lives), you will probably have noticed some shifts in the media strategies of the anti-drug campaigns aimed at young adults. Among other things, in recent months, I’ve seen efforts aimed at getting parents more aware and involved in what their children are doing, a new campaign warning parents about the possibility and ease of teen abuse of prescription drugs, and (my favorite) a shift in anti-marijuana advertising from dwelling on possibly horrific outcomes to exploring the possibility that smoking pot can leave one as an under-employed 30-something loser who mooches off his parents. (And who says there’s never any truth in advertising?) Honestly, I’ve always been something of a fan of anti-drug advertising, as it tends to be creative in its approach, and it’s hard to think of a more difficult creative task than to convince teenagers (who are not exactly famous for their tendency to worry about their mortality or long-term health) not to buy something that doesn’t need to advertise to sell like crazy, and which carries no little bit of entertainment and counter-culture glamour.
So why am I even interested? Well, among other things, drug use–like nearly every other high-risk adolescent behavior–remains more common among boys than girls, and it tends to have a pretty strongly negative effect on boys’ education, health, and life prospects. So it’s interesting to see how the anti-drug campaigns develop. Take, for example, the aforementioned new focus on prescription drug abuse, which you may have first noticed among the hilarious talking animals and Adventures In CGI that made up this year’s Superbowl ads. Those are actually part of a new initative from the Office of National Drug Control Policy, which launched the effort in response to the increase in drug treatment admissions for prescription painkillers, the fact that teens abuse prescription drugs more than any other drug except marijuana, and the evidence that parents are largely unaware of the problem. So that’s today’s public service message: keep an eye on your medicine cabinet, because it’s the easiest and cheapest source of a high for the average teenager. What with the vast majority of medicine cabinets being unarmed and unlikely to require cash up front.
Incidentally, if you’re interested in more details about the government’s national anti-drug strategy, President Bush will be addressing the issue tomorrow (Saturday, March 1) during his weekly national radio address. And if you’re into reading government budgets (and if you are, please keep that to yourself, because some things are far too weird for a family blog like this one), you can see the budget summary of the strategy here.
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Paper or Plastic? Skeeda, please–
Submitted by Non-Toxic Kids
Ready for some statistics that will make you remember your cloth bags on your next trip to the grocery store? I know, remembering more than the kids (and the diaper bag) and a food list is a pain in the #$%*. Here’s why we should remember anyway–
The average family accumulates over 60 bags in only 4 trips to the grocery store. That is a lot of plastic! So paper should be better, right?
It takes more than 4 times as much energy to manufacture a paper bag then it does a plastic bag. Add that to the fact that making paper bags produces tons of greenhouse gases, and forests help control climate change to begin with. Maybe not the better choice.
And according to the Wall Street Journal, the U.S. consumes 100 billion plastic shopping bags annually requiring approximately 12 million barrels of oil. Not so good for that energy independence idea everyone keeps talking about (well, not everyone. See the last post for the sad reality of what our presidential candidates are not talking about).
So, what to do? I have plenty of very ugly, stained cloth bags I cart to the store every week. But recently, a got a snazzy new addition from a friend (the same friend who gave me these statistics). I received a big, beautiful (and clean!) striped cloth bag made by Skeeda. It was made in the U.S. of A (hoorah!). It is huge and holds lots of groceries, unlike my other less appealing bags. The label shares more startling statistics, if you need a few more to motivate you to get those bags into your car:
It is estimated that 500 billion to 1 trillion (yes, you read that right) plastic bags are thrown out annually worldwide (which equates to 1 million per minute), and that 96% of plastic bags end up in landfills.
And this is one that surprised me: the petroleum used to make 14 plastic bags is enough to drive a care one mile!
Visit Skeeda’s website at www.skeeda.com to buy snazzy cloth bags to stop the mayhem.
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Kids and Shots: what matters to them
Submitted by Dr. Gwenn Is In
With the news this week that ProQuad seems cause an increase in fever-related seizures, many parents are now left wondering how to schedule their child care visits. Are more visits needed if they separate out the shots?
ProQuad is a combination vaccine of measles, mumps, rubella and Chicken pox. Clearly, any combo shot has a great advantage for the child if it preserves immunity. But, in this case, as reported by AP, a study showed a two fold increase in seizures in toddlers getting that shot. Clearly enough of a reason for us to pause and consider whether the reduction in that one shot for that visit is worth the risk of a seizure.
What is a child’s experience? Turns out kids remember more the amount of visits they have for shots than the amount of shots per visit. So, even though 4 or 5 shots in a visit is a big number, a child still just recalls the one visit. The overall anxiety of the child is minimized by consolidating those shots to that one visit, as opposed to having the child return for multiple visits where the child’s anxiety would be repeated for each of those visits.
I’m sure more studies will be done. In the mean time, good fever control is the key for parents opting to use ProQuad for their children. Your pediatrician will review that with you. Since that is the side-effect in question, eliminate that with anti-fever medications, and all should be fine. And, if you are still concerned, just give your kids the shots the old fashioned way - separately.
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Treating Your Child’s Croup or RSV Infection
Submitted by Childn’Parent
Waking from a sound sleep, I hear the hoarse, crying voice of my four year old son. He coughs several times, sounding just like the neighbor’s barking dog. It’s nighttime and it’s the croup, or RSV. I call our pediatrician and make a plan to help keep him comfortable through the night.
RSV, or croup, is often worse during the night and parents need a strategy to help their child breath more freely. Here are some basic recommendations taken from medical references to help treat your child’s symptoms of croup or RSV.
Steam is a natural homeopathic remedy that can open nasal and bronchial passages for freer breathing. For small babies, be sure to consult a medical professional before using this method of treatment. Loosen your child’s clothing and take the child into the bathroom. Run the shower on hot to create a steam air environment. Place the child on your lap and encourage them to breath in the surrounding steam. Be sure to keep the child safely away from the hot water. Run the shower for about ten minutes, dry the child from any dampness, then carry the child into the cooler air. Often this hot/cool air treatment will cause a child’s croupy throat to clear; restoring a more normal breathing pattern.
A cool air humidifier is also a good weapon against the croup or RSV. Position the humidifier near the child’s bed so that the cool mist will circulate within the child’s breathing range. Use purified water and change it at least once a day to prevent bacterial growth. Check the humidifier at least once during the night to be sure that it is properly working.
A mild, over the counter decongestant and expectorant is also helpful. Avoid medications with antihistamine as this drug can make a croupy condition worse. Be sure to follow proper dosing instructions for your child’s age and weight. A decongestant will loosen congestion in the upper respiratory tract, while an expectorant will help prevent severe chest congestion.
These home treatments are recommended by a medical professional in treating the initial stages of croup, or RSV. As the severity of illness is different for each child, parents should consult a medical professional to determine which treatment option is best. Should a child’s breathing pattern become highly irregular, parents should seek professional medical assistance immediately.
Having a child sick with the croup is a scary experience. Parents should be observant during the initial stages of croup and take measures to prevent it from becoming a more serious infection.
Learn to recognize, prevent and treat your child’s croup, or RSV infection at childnparent.com.
By: Debby Hoffer
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Just Some Short Notes Today
Submitted by Boys and Schools Blog
There’s an interesting debate going on regarding the efficacy of single-sex education on the Wall Street Journal’s “The Juggle” (basically, a juggling-family-and-work blog). The impetus for the discussion comes from the decision of Georgia’s Greene County School Board to introduce single-sex academies–a decision that has brought them some criticism, but which I defended in an earlier entry. It is true that I believe that single-sex programs must be introduced with more in mind than simply separating the sexes and hoping that will solve all the problems. A truly effective single-sex program must include an awareness of boys and girls learning and developmental differences. But I do think that such a bold and inventive solution might do a lot to help struggling students in troubled schools.
As an aside, Boys and Schools is looking for a few good volunteers to help with some internet research and data collection. We’re really working to create a resource database for parents in need and can use your help. If you (or someone you know) is interested, please email us at schools@menshealthnetwork.net.
Ok, please forgive me for the short post , but it’s a bit of a zoo here today. I do have some interesting stuff on board for tomorrow, so I’ll see y’all then.
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In Memorium
Submitted by Boys and Schools Blog
It just came to my attention that William F. Buckley, author, thinker, and conservative icon, has passed away. I know this is a little unusual, since I don’t ordinarily use this space for such reflections, but I just wanted to take a moment to pay my respects to one of the world’s great gentlemen.
I first came across Mr. Buckley’s writings during my college years, when I was immersed in my semi-lefty politics of trendiness. (To my everlasting embarrassment, I did things like vote for fringe third-party candidates and may have even used the term, “the man,” in all seriousness.) In this situation, to encounter Buckley’s depth of thought and witty eloquence was . . .well . . .a little frustrating frankly. It gave me the sinking feeling that I didn’t know what I was talking about and that I was expressing myself poorly to boot.
Since that time, I’ve recognized the shallowness of many of my former positions and started treating politics and issues of policy with the seriousness they deserve. (That is, sometimes they deserve to be taken utterly seriously, and sometimes they deserved to be laughed at until they collapse.) I may not always have agreed with Mr. Buckley’s positions–though over time I found myself increasingly influenced by his arguments. I somehow doubt that this reflects him becoming considerably more liberal. Regardless, I have always admired the principle and rigorous thought that went into his arguments.
Most of all, however, I admired his writing. To some extent it may be a matter of taste, but one can go a long time before finding another author with such a strong and precise command of the language. I was forever in awe of the craftsmanship that seemed evident in his sentences–in his honor, I’d really have to describe his writing as lapidary. (A word a learned from one of his articles and never thought I’d get the chance to use in real life.)
I did not know Mr. Buckley or his family, but I offer them my deepest condolences. We have lost a great man, and our country and our language is poorer for it.
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Chemicals in Your Body, “The Next Big Environmental Issue After Global Warming”–
Submitted by Non-Toxic Kids
I recently came across an article in Newsweek called “The Chemicals Within”. It was filled with shocking statistics, quotes and studies about BPA, Phthalates, and PBDEs (flame retardants).
The article starts by describing a biomonitoring project where people’s blood and urine are tested for the presence of chemicals. And they found potentially harmful chemicals in all the people they tested, no matter where they lived (even in remote Alaska), in the categories of BPA, Phthalates and PBDEs. What really stopped me in my tracks was this quote, from a cosponsor of the study, Sharyle Patton of the group Commonweal. “Our babies are being born pre-polluted. This is going to be the next big environmental issue after climate change.”
Let that sink in.
Another topic discussed was the ancient Toxic Substances Control Act of 1976 where many chemicals were grandfathered in without much testing. “Scientists say we’re now awash in a chemical brew of hormone-mimicking compounds that didn’t exist 100 years ago.” the article states.
This paints a pretty clear, scary image, doesn’t it?
You can take action to promote the reform of this act by clicking here.
This article is jam full of studies and solid, understandable information about BPA, Phthalates and PBDEs. It is worth a close read. Here is the link.
I am glad these issues are making their way into our national consciousness. It is high time for change, careful monitoring and more testing to be done to protect our most vulnerable. I only wish as I listened to the 20th democratic debate last night, that the candidates were asked something about environmental health, food safety, or environmental issues. I heard a comment on NPR that said the candidates (both parties) were asked by interviewers about the environment with about as much frequency as they are asked about alien encounters. I wish I was joking. The more articles published like this one in Newsweek will hopefully wake up our public and policy makers to the chemical cocktail we are testing on our children.
image: www.chemicalbodyburden.org
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Submitted by MS&L Public Relations
Hi, Children’s Health Blog. I’m writing on behalf of PKIDs, a national nonprofit whose mission is to educate the public about infectious diseases and help families whose children are affected by such diseases.
We’re trying to raise awareness of pertussis, also known as “whooping cough.” I have an online resource I thought would be of interest to you or your readers. The site is:
www.pkids.org/pertussis
Pertussis, as you probably know, is a potentially deadly bacterial infection that can strike at any age, but is particularly dangerous for babies. Adults are the number one transmitter of pertussis to babies. One of the best ways to protect babies from pertussis is to make sure that anyone in close contact with them is vaccinated.
At PKIDs’ web site, you can hear an audio clip of what whooping cough sounds like and get advice on how to talk to your doctor about protecting your child or children you may care for from pertussis. This is all part of a campaign to raise awareness of pertussis called “Silence the Sounds of Pertussis.”
We hope you will check out the site and pass it on to your readers. Thanks so much for your time, and don’t hesitate to contact me with any questions.
Sincerely,
Charlie Kondek
Director of New Media Relations
MS&L Digital
office: 734-214-1550 x 101
mobile: 734-576-6754
This Just In….Teens Are Moody and Tweens Swear!
Submitted by Dr. Gwenn Is In
From the files of “tell me something I don’t already know”, comes this study. The headline is sure to catch the attention of every parent of a teen, or tween for that matter: “Teen Brain May Be Wired for Moodiness”.
I could have told them that! In fact, they could have videotaped my morning today for a wonderful example. One minute we are happily eating breakfast and the next my 13 year old is grabbing her backpack and huffing out the door as her friend arrived to walk to school. The instigating event: her sister had asked her to move her backpack from the breakfast bar so she could have room to eat, and my 13 year old felt that request was “inconvenient”. It was a lovely family moment.
Softpedia has a great summary of other brain changes in teenagers that explain just about every behavior we’ve all seen in teens from poor judgment to impulsiveness. The part you’ll love the most is this:
“It is not known exactly what marks the transition from adolescence to adulthood. The end of puberty, or sexual maturation, is well defined. It is the point when bones stop growing, at around age 16 for girls and 17.5 for boys. But for adolescence, the transition from childhood to adulthood, there is no clear endpoint.”
Following close behind in teen news, is this posted on MomLogic today. This may surprise you, that tween swearing is on the rise. Keep in mind that tweens are 8-12 year olds. Having a tween at home and a very new teen, who only months ago was a tween, I can attest to the validity of this observation. Keep in mind that kids are sponges for what their peers do so even if you have the cleanest language at home, they will talk the talk of their buds at school. Kids this age want to fit in and to fit in means to sound the right way.
So, what’s a mom and dad to do? Help them develop a filter so that the potty mouth doesn’t become a bad habit. Do so by example but also by pointing out to them how other kids sound when they talk that way. Perhaps allow some “safe” words once in a while but draw the line on words that are clearly dirty, degrading or just down and out evil.
By the way, there are role models in pop culture for some rather funny ways to let off steam without cursing. In Hannah Montana they say “sweet niblets” instead of curses and all of us have started saying that in lieu of more colorful words.
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Taking On the School
Submitted by Boys and Schools Blog
Working with parents–mostly moms, actually–who are concerned about their son’s school performance, it has become increasingly clear to me that one of the biggest hurdles that parents face when trying to improve their son’s grades comes in communicating with teachers and school officials. Now, I’m not saying that there aren’t bad teachers or apathetic principals out there, but the vast majority of teachers and education professionals that I’ve met have been dedicated and concerned about helping their struggling students. Now, there’s probably a bit of a reporting bias at work here, since teachers who contact me or come to one of our presentations are probably inclined to be concerned about boys issues. And yes, my own sister is a teacher, and having seen her try to balance her concern for at-risk kids and her many responsibilities to the school, so I like to give most educators the benefit of the doubt–that they are usually concerned but overwhelmed and not necessarily in possession of the tools or flexibility to change their classroom.
So one of the first questions I always ask when people come to us for help is what happened when the talked to their school. Unfortunately, had the early conversations with the school gone well, there wouldn’t have been much need to contact us. That’s why I have to stress that when you go to speak with the school about your son’s educational difficulties, it pays to be prepared. Take examples of ways that they can help make their classroom more boy-friendly. (For example, ask about opportunities for your sons to release restless energy or what kind of reading content they’re working on.)
And, if your complaints aren’t getting through, remember that there is power in numbers. Unite with other parents who have similar concerns and go to the administrators with the changes you’d like to see, whether it be an improved mentoring program, the introduction of some single-sex classes or programs, etc. (As a side note, it helps if you’re willing to support and help the school in these objectives.) It’s a lot harder to ignore a coalition of local parents than just one.
But remember, the point here is to ally with the educators in helping boys do better, not treat them as obstacles. Unless you get one of the few bad apples, of course. Incidentally, we’ve been getting so many requests for help with this situation that I’m attempting to put together an introductory “help kit” for parents with suggestions on how to approach educators and tips on creating boy-friendly classrooms. As always, we can use your help, and a donation to assist in the creation of these kits (as well as any pointers or advice from educators or experienced parents), would be greatly appreciated.
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The Meningitis Scare…What You Need To Know
Submitted by Dr. Gwenn Is In
The recent meningitis news is frightening and has many parents wondering if they should be worrying when their kids complain of headache and happen to have a fever. While a frightening illness, meningitis is more difficult to get than you would think. Before you panic, check out what I have to say at A Dose of Dr. Gwenn.
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Betrayed by BPA (Bisphenol-A) containing Nalgene Bottles–
Submitted by Non-Toxic Kids
Ever since I headed off to college, and started hiking out west, I have been drinking from my Nalgene bottle. All through college, schlepping a bottle to class and on countless backpacking and camping trips, my trusted Nalgene was there. I even remember one very cold, long backpacking trip where I filled a Nalgene with hot water, and slept holding it in an attempt to stay warm.
Then they came out with the lovely skinny necked bottles. I used those all through grad school and in my first years of teaching. I used them until a few years ago when I first heard about Bisphenol-A in polycarbonate (#7) plastics. When I searched for a new water bottle, I was surprised to learn that our local sports store still only carried the colorful new (although toxic) bottles. And I was seeing toddlers using the smaller, equally snazzy ones everywhere.
I thought at least the BPA would only leech out into water at high temperatures. Then I read this post by Enviroblog, citing a study that showed BPA (an endocrine system disrupting chemical, linked to cancer and brain development problems) leeching into water at room temperature.
I felt betrayed. All those years. I guess I am mostly a lost cause, growing up in the 80s with all our Velveeta and Steak-ums (sorry, mom), I am probably full of preservatives and chemicals. But at least we can limit our kids’ exposure to BPA, and hopefully it will be banned for use in plastics that come into contact with humans soon.
Despite mounting research to the contrary, Nalgene insists their products are safe. They even cite the American Plastics Council as a reliable resource (no conflict of interest, there–).
For more information see the other BPA articles listed under Labels.
Here is an article about BPA in canned goods and water bottles from the Green Guide.
And an article from CNN about BPA and Nalgene.
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New Report on BPA (Bisphenol-A) in baby products from Z recommends–
Submitted by Non-Toxic Kids
The folks over at Z recommends have done their homework. They have an updated report on which companies are completely BPA (Bisphenol-A)free and company ratings relating to BPA usage in their products, ranging from Excellent, all the way down to Poor. Each company listed as a link to more information, with contact and website links.
I think the easiest thing to do it so evaluate your existing baby and kid gear using this report, and then if you buy anything new, buy from the BPA free companies if you can.
Here is the link. Thanks to Z recommends for all their hard work help parents keep BPA out of our kids.
If you are new to this issue, read this post to learn a little more about BPA in baby bottles and sippy cups. I would definitely use the Z recommends report as a guide for BPA in products, since it has been recently updated. I’ve written at least 10 articles that relate to BPA in plastic, infant formula, and the effects of it in our bodies. To learn more, visit the labels section of this blog, listed on the right side, and click on BPA.
Ways to take action about BPA:
Support reform to the Toxic Substances Control Act
Get BPA out of Baby Bottles
—so we don’t have to keep up with the endless product and company research. BPA should be eliminated from all plastics that humans use.
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Tell Corporations How you Feel about Recalled Toys and Product Safety (and reform the CPSC while we’re at it)!
Submitted by Non-Toxic Kids
I recently discovered a fantastic non-profit group called Parents for Ethical Marketing. According to their website, PEM is…” is a new grassroots organization of parents and others concerned about corporate marketing practices directed at young children.” They have some sobering statistics about the media and raising kids on their homepage, and they have an exciting opportunity for parents to give their feedback to companies who make, sell and market products to our children.
Apparently, PEM was contacted by a representative from Vision Conscious Brands, which represents corporations who are interested in having a positive social impact. They want to hear from parents about product safety, toy recalls, and other environmental, social and economic issues we are concerned about.
To read the call to action on PEM’s website, click here. You’ll see questions from Shari Aaron of Vision Conscious Brands, and at the bottom you can write your answers as comments on the blog, or email them at lisa (at) parentsforethicalmarketing.org.
Thanks to Parents for Ethical Marketing for this opportunity. I hope you will join me in adding your 2 cents.
And- I just noticed on their blog a way to take action in support of the CPSC reform act, from Consumer’s Union. Click here.
Parents working together can change this world yet–
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A Little Help Here?
Submitted by Boys and Schools Blog
I made a rookie parenting mistake the other day. When Andy (the 4 year old) told me that his teddy bear “baby” needed a bath, I was so distracted by his brother and sister that I said something along the lines of, “ok, whatever.” Oops. I know that they’re stuffed with foam and such, but those teddy bears can absorb and discharge and awful lot of water. I think the bathroom floor is still recovering.
Clearly, we all need a little help from time to time. For example, I obviously need the Mistake Guy to jump out of the closet and sing, “Miiistaaaake,” at me when I do things like absentmindedly give my son permission to wash his bear in the bathroom sink using (coincidentally) the ridiculously expensive boutique hair products I got suckered into buying. Utilities bill aside, however, that is a small problem. In terms of big problems, every week, I have worried parents calling or writing us looking for help for their boys. The backstories are varied–sometimes it’s about the absence of a parent, sometimes it’s about concern over the school’s push for an ADHD diagnosis, and so on. But in the end, the heart of the problem is a mother or father who is worried about the fact that their son is struggling with school.
We offer all of the help and support that we can, but we have limited resources and personnel, and so I’m asking for your help. Have you ever thought about volunteering or interning for a non-profit organization? Do you know about any great programs for boys in your area? If so, please email us at schools@menshealthnetwork.net and help us help others. And if volunteering isn’t your bag, but you still want to do what you can, you might also considering donating to Boys and Schools instead.
Thank you for your help. It really does make all the difference.
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Breaking News! Boys Have Feelings!
Submitted by Boys and Schools Blog
As far as I’m concerned, this should garner a big fat, “duh,” from most people who read about it, but a recent study to be published in the Journal of Adolescence reports that teenage boys are more motivated by love and a desire for relationships than by sex when it comes to dating. I know it’s a useful cliché that boys are only interested in sex–and I won’t argue with the proposition that men and women often have different attitudes about sex. But do people honestly believe that boys don’t approach relationships with the same hopes and fears and emotions as . . . well . . . other human beings? If so, I think it’s time that we back slowly away from the chick-lit complaints and romantic comedy plot devices.
I can honestly say that not only am I not surprised by the study, I find it a little offensive that it even needs to be said. As anyone who has ever seen a little boy with a crush knows, boys are all about the romance. I’m not saying (and neither is the report) that sex never enters the picture as a motivating factor for boys, but I’d more or less expect to see the same thing in a study of girls’ relationship motivations as well. And to act as though it’s a big surprise that boys put value on love and finding a good relationship just feeds into all of the destructive and negative stereotypes about men and boys.
To be fair to the report’s authors, they say much the same thing, and note, moreover, that no matter what their outward behavior may indicate, teenage boys are fairly receptive to parental messages about respect and getting to know a girl. Yet, boys get this kind of relationship instruction from their parents much less often than girls do. Perhaps this is a function of the different ways that parents communicate with daughters versus sons, or maybe it just means that we don’t place as high a priority on talking to our boys about healthy relationships. Whatever the case, it is a good reminder to overcome whatever awkwardness you might feel about the situation and give your son the same benefit of your hard-earned wisdom. Or, if you’re like me and occasionally find your personal wisdom in short supply, general wisdom will do as well.
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A New Prince in My Life
Submitted by Childn’Parent
As the princess of my castle, it stands to reason that the only prince in my life should be my husband. But there is a new guy in the family picture. He is my new puppy and stands about a foot tall, is devilishly handsome with soft brown eyes, caramel brown fur and a black snout.
It was a process of delicate negotiation to try and come up with an appropriate name for our new doggy. After holding a family council, at the round table, the official vote of our five kids finally came down to “Prince Edmund.” The name was expanded after our Prince went on an unapproved crusade and killed our gerbil, Peanut. A grisly affair that I will not go into except to say that his official name is now “Prince Edmund, gerbil slayer.”
This dog has brought substantial excitement into this princesses hum drum life. For the first week we had jousting tournaments over who was going to feed him, now I’m paying reward money for anyone who will feed him. In a very short time he has chewed through two pairs of shoes and gone on more unapproved crusades than I can count; spreading garbage throughout my beloved castle.
It is a lot of work keeping up with this prince, but well worth the effort. When anyone comes to the door, it’s nice to know that he will bark and be another champion defender in my life. It is also is a great laugh as I watch my five kids get and give slobbery good night kisses to this sweet little Prince. So to those of you wondering what to get your family for that special bonding, I say, stock up on the dog food, and get another prince in your life. You won’t regret it.
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By Debby Hoffer
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Learning How They Learn
Submitted by Boys and Schools Blog
Call it the burden of knowledge. Because I know about the pitfalls that can await boys in school, I worry maybe a bit too much about how my boys will do in that environment. Sure enough, I do my best to follow all of the Boys and Schools advice–I read to them, making an effort to find stories that appeal to their tastes. I don’t overreact to their rough and tumble play or the two-year old’s determination to fight invisible foes (complete with comic book sound effects to accompany his punches). And, knowing that language skills can develop more slowly in boys and that rushing or pressuring your sons over it will just leave them discouraged and leave you frustrated, I tried very, very hard not to worry about the fact that Mags seemed to be slower to develop language than his older brother. (Memory is a tricky thing, however, and my husband insists that they’ve developed virtually at the same rate and that I’m being paranoid. Whatever the case may be, I’m almost certain that Mags has been holding out on me a bit, since I couldn’t help but notice the incredibly manipulative way he employs his knowledge of the word, “Mommy,” which he remembers when sad, in trouble, or in need of a cookie, but conveniently forgets when he is busy with other things.)
At any rate, since I was born without the craftiness gene, and cannot color neatly or cut paper in a straight line, I was a bit flummoxed about how to approach working with my boys on their numbers and letters. I tried number puzzles and the like, but failed to keep their attention. Inevitably, one of them would start smashing the letters together, and the other would get bored and walk off with one of the pieces. Not to mention that all of our alphabet learning tools seem to immediately lose the “J” and the “W.” I assume all of the Js and Ws are off in an alternate universe with dozens of mismatched socks and lonely action figures.
Fortunately for me, what Mother Nature neglected, Microsoft managed to rectify. I decided to turn my sons’ interest in our computer to good account and made a series of flash cards using Microsoft Powerpoint. Yes, my husband and my sisters both laughed at the obssessive mom geekiness on display, but I’m not embarrassed. Ok, maybe a little embarrased. Alright, a lot embarrassed. But it worked–the little flash card programs were a great way to get them to work on recognizing numbers, letters, shapes, and colors. The boys got the fun of “playing” on the computer, and I found a way to teach them in a way that kept them from losing interest and wandering away to crash their Hot Wheels off the coffee table. What’s more, with his older brother as an example and source of encouragement, Mags finally got excited about learning and talking. Of course, now he won’t stop talking, so be careful what you wish for.
My point here is that as parents, we have to be creative and work with our own knowledge of our boys to find ways to reach them. Believe me, I tried plenty of ways to get my preschooler to understand the concept of counting–some of them even involved jelly beans. But the one that finally got through was when I used clip art helicopters and cars and put them into a computer flash card game. And when you start to know more about how your son learns, that puts you in an even better position to help them–and their teachers–when they’re in school.
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Take Action to Get Harmful Chemicals Out of Toys and Everyday Products for our Kids!
Submitted by Non-Toxic Kids
The great folks over at Healthytoys.org, that provided us with that helpful database of what toxins are in what toys (check it out here), are petitioning lawmakers to overhaul the ancient Toxic Substances Control Act. This act, when it was created 30 years, ago grandfathered the use of many dangerous chemicals into law. The European Union has already completed extensive research on many of these chemicals and is phasing out or banning usage in their products (hence the “EU compliant” label many organic and natural labeled prodcuts carry). This act desperately needs an update and the chemical industry (along with their lobbyists and cash) will fight this tooth and nail. Add your voice to the petition so lawmakers can hear from concerned parents who want companies and toy makers to stop adding harmful chemicals to products we use everyday.
Sign the petition here, and thanks to Healthytoys.org.
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Georgia On My Mind
Submitted by Boys and Schools Blog
I’ve been thinking about what I shoud say about the decision of the school board of Greene County, Georgia, to switch exclusively to single-sex academic classes. (The students will still ride the same buses to school and the sports and band programs will remained mixed, but–from what I’ve read about it anyway–the academic classes will be changed to a single-gender format.) The esteemed Dr. Leonard Sax, who generally applauds single-sex initiatives as head of the National Association for Single-Sex Public Education, has criticized the plan for not allowing students/parents to opt-out of the single-sex program, and suggested that it may be illegal.
I truly do understand Dr. Sax’s point and he’s probably right–single-sex classes are an option, not a one-size-fits-all solution. And it may well be a setback to the cause of allowing more single-sex programs nationwide to force students in one district to go only to single-sex schools. (The legal issues are another thing altogether, but I’m just focusing on the basic “right or wrong” aspect of the county’s decision separate from the legal consideration.)
On the other hand, I have to stop short of hammering on the school board about this completely, since it seems there’s more to the story. According to the county Superintendent of Schools, Greene County’s high school ranks 332 out of 369 high schools in Georgia. Apparently, the situation is dire enough that the state of the county schools discourages people from moving to that county. The school board unanimously approved the measure and the program includes plans to train teachers in gender-based learning styles.
From the outside, it looks as though a school system that knows it is consistently failing its students decided to do something bold and revolutionary to change that. That’s not to say that they haven’t made some mistakes here. Checking the legality of it would have been smart, and I’m concerned that anything less than a remarkable turnaround for the county’s schools will be seen as a failure of single-sex education, when there are obviously many other issues at work here. And, like Dr. Sax, I’m not especially happy to see that students aren’t given a choice between coed and single-sex programs. But I will say that I was impressed by the willingness of the school board to take drastic action to help improve their schools. I can’t say that they haven’t demonstrated flexibility and a desire to try innovative ways to help boys–just that I wish they might have been a bit more prudent about it.
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Worried about the Meat Recall in your Child’s School?
Submitted by Non-Toxic Kids
After my last post I was thinking about how I would be feeling if I had school age children who might have eaten some of the recalled meat (described first in this post, and then again in yesterday’s post below). I do know from reading the articles that thankfully no one has been sickened yet (that we know of) by the possibly tainted meat. I would want to know if in the very least, the meat has been seperated and set aside, out of the risk of consumpution by children.
One Vermont paper contacted a few schools to see what they are doing about the recalled meat, and it was encouraging to read that one school had set the recalled meat aside after the investigation by the USDA was launched two weeks ago. All the groups they contacted had taken the meat out of use. If you are a Vermont reader, you can find that story here. If you live in another state and are concerned, I would try reading your local papers to see if they ran a story like ours did. A more simple solution would be to call your child’s school, and ask if the recalled meat has been removed from the food supply. Most likely, it has, and this will just reassure you.
If you know of more information about this that would be helpful to readers, please post it here.
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Meat Recall: Update to Unsafe Practices at the Westland/Hallmark Meat Packing Plant–
Submitted by Non-Toxic Kids
The unsafe (and cruel) practices discovered by the Humane Society and described in this post have led to the recall of 143 million pounds of beef, much of it sent to school lunch programs. See this article from the Seattle Times.
Apparently, the meat was not available to consumers at grocery stores. It was sold to schools through the federal school lunch program and was purchased by some fast food stores, including Jack in the Box and In-N-Out burger. Both of these restaurants said they stopped using the meat earlier this month when they heard of the problems at the meat packing plant. Unfortunately, many news outlets are reporting that much of the meat has already been eaten by children nationwide in the school lunch program, but thankfully there have been no reported illnesses from the consumption of this meat. The beef was recalled by the USDA as a precautionary measure due to the unsafe practices discovered at the plant.
Here is an abc news report about the situation, and here is the Humane Society’s response to the recall.
Hopefully, word of this recall will reach all of our nation’s schools so no more of the recalled meat will be eaten by our kids. Spread the word!
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Do Baby Boys Cause Depression?
Submitted by Boys and Schools Blog
Well, considering the response to my yesterday’s entry about obesity and sleep, I just have to add that when the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Now then. There has been a lot of internet chatter going on lately about a study from France indicating that women who give birth to boy babies tend to suffer greater incidences of post-partum depression and generally report a lower quality of life than those that have girls. Moreover, this finding was apparently unaffected by whether it was the first child or a subsequent child–if you are a Frenchwoman who just had a boy, according to this study, you’re going to be feeling much worse about things than if you’d had a girl.
I’m not going to go leaping to a bunch of conclusions about the implications here because we are looking at only one study with no real information about why this trend (if it really is widespread) exists. What exactly is it about having a boy child that might result in higher rates of depression? I do think that it is interesting, however, that this study was conducted in a community where the researcers felt there was no strong cultural pressure to have a girl or boy. Moreover, previous studies of this type that were carried out in areas where there is pressure to have a boy child found higher incidences of depression among mothers of girls.
So I can’t help but wonder whether this community is really as pressure-free as the researchers seem to think it is. I myself have noticed a swing in certain circles from favoring boys to favoring girls and seeing boys as potential troublemakers, etc. It certainly worried me a lot as a new mom, and I wonder whether these depressed mothers of boys are an indication that we’re not really as bias-free about children’s gender as we like to think we are.
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Follow Up to McDonald’s Advertising on Report Cards–
Submitted by Non-Toxic Kids
In December I wrote about advertisements for McDonald’s appearing on children’s report cards in Florida. Read the original post here.
I am happy to report that thanks to the Campaign for a Commercial Free Childhood’s parent campaign, McDonald’s stopped this offensive advertising practice.
It’s easy to get cynical about many of the issues I write about here, that we all are facing everyday. It is inspiring to me to see real people making difference, even with a huge company. Read all about the sucess at the Campaign for a Commercial Free Childhood’s website, here.
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